Tuesday: Post MRI

So I had my scan and everything so far had STAT written on the top, and boy did that happen. I got the results from my test that evening. At 5 I missed the call from Dr Myers and I realized I need to put my new surgeon and oncologist's numbers in my phone instead of all these random numbers. The message said he would call back so we waited. And waited. Until 6 and he said there was something in my liver they assume to be cysts, but wanted to get a clearer picture. I thought, cool, they're making sure my whole body still works. And then we get off the phone and Chayse says, "Looks like they want to see if the cancer is spreading and if you are in a further stage." Oh honey. That sure helped me sleep better Tuesday night!!

Before we got those results though, I had a call from the oncology department. I actually answered their call as I was getting ready to go to my MRI and requested a call later in the afternoon. They called back around 4 and said something like, "We have an appointment for you tomorrow at 3 with your nurse navigator (Huh??) and then you will be meeting Dr Reese, your oncologist, on Monday at 9:30 to discuss the treatment plan." Oh man. I got off the phone and slightly lost it. Even with regular appointments I think, 'Pippa usually naps at this time, and then this kid has this on Wednesday so it would be best if we did it in the morning' or whatnot like any multi-tasking mom does. Then once the plan is determined I tell them, "Nah, let's do 11. That would work better for my family." Instead I am told where and when and who. It's just frustrating to let go on things that I should be in control of. I just have to show up and be happy with the results.

After releasing some tears, I got a game plan. I texted some people, sorted out the appointments and on my way. I must admit, through everything no one has questioned me. You have loved and given expecting nothing. You have brought meals every day this past week. You have tried to take my babies to watch them. Gifts and flowers have shown up on my doorstep and I have never felt alone. Not only has God been watching over me by showering me with what seems like an infinite amount of love and comfort, but I have so many angels making sure I am feeling okay and my needs, and that of my family, are met.

In response to how I am feeling: Normal. Like nothing is wrong. Which is why it is so confusing. I'm not pukey, not achey, no flu-like symptoms and no runny nose here. Nothing. The only thing are the pains and sensations that come from my tumor every once in a while. But otherwise I am in good health.